Koji-ki Addison Wolf
Please Save the Wolves.
March 12, 1995 - November 21, 2007
Rest in Peace my sweet baby boy.
Rest in Peace my sweet baby boy.
Wednesday Nov. 21 at 8:06PM PST Koji passed away from cancer, quietly, with Hannah and I. We buried him Thanksgiving morning in the high desert above Palm Desert in a small place called Anza. He now overlooks a mountain range and agricultural valley, it's very nice.
Even though Koji was 12 years old and in excellent health before an extremely aggressive form of cancer took him he only suffered one other serious ailment, Leptosperosis. That year he aged visibly but his recovery only led to our discovery of the first cancer the following year. Removal was performed and it seemed we were in the clear till last August when it returned. A second operation netted what seemed to be excellent result till the last week of October when it struck again, this time it was not reasonable to operate and put him through what would have been a devastating surgery with no guarantee that the vet could possibly remove all of it.
I chose to make him as comfortable as possible, feed him anything he wanted, and wait. He became immobilized almost completely in the first week and a half, hobbled but he still wanted his walks and for a while we still went on them then they got shorter until finally he couldn't get up anymore. His last few days we tried to give him pain medications but they proved to unnerve and frighten him too much and we stopped giving them to him. He calmed down and rested peacefully, for the most part. He spoke quietly during his last hours, letting me know that he wasn't able to hang on much longer.
Koji was one of my best friends, he had impeccable taste for food and people. Koji kept me going with his enthusiasm, his demands that I exercise regularly, his never ending love, licks and the occasional overly exuberant punch in the groin. He was always happy to be wherever I was and most of all preferred to be the center of attention, which wasn't hard for him considering his personality and how beautiful he was right up to the very end.
We traveled the United States together, camped, hiked, climbed mountains and ran the beaches on both east and west coasts. We met lots of people both near and far and everyone agreed, Koji was a top notch companion, friend, confidante and spectacular judge of character (keeping me out of what most likely would have been quite a bit of trouble on more than one occasion).
Even though Koji hated water, wouldn't chase a ball or stick, couldn't hold his liquor, and despised smoking. He wouldn't run a straight line, making it impossible to bike or rollerblade with him but his curiosity about every blade of grass was enthusiastic and I loved that. He just lived for the walks and hikes we went on, now I live for those walks more than ever.
He loved my friends & family, their families and in most cases their cats. He preferred the passenger seat and only gave it up willingly for Hannah, whom he also loved & protected (something I'd never seen him do before) both viciously and with much jealously - even from me. Right up to the end, he still wanted to sleep on the bed with Hannah but couldn't get up on the bed anymore and wouldn't let me lift him up to it.
There isn't enough I could say about Koji and what made his so amazingly special. His personality and behavior defined him more than his beautiful markings. His calm, gentle, patient demeanor made him such a pleasure to have with me all the time and he traveled so well that leaving him behind because situations wouldn't allow for him to join me just broke my heart. Whenever we were apart all I could think of was how he was doing and how soon we could be together again.
He will always be so close to me that even now it's hard to believe that he's actually gone, even after holding him as he breathed his last breath. I became a part of Koji's life an hour after he was born and that relationship ended with his burial. Koji was my child and I poured all my love into him and I cared for him as much as I would have had he been of my own blood. Nothing is ever going to be the same again without his wagging tail & happy smile, waking me up every morning wanting to be a part of my life everyday then cuddling up with me every night.
Koji saved my life. When he came along I hadn't yet realized that I was feeling lonely and depressed all the time. Koji changed that, he gave me a purpose again in life. He showed me that life isn't about sitting in the dark making other people rich while my life passed me by, he took me back outside into the sunshine. By his example nothing was so bad that it couldn't be remedied with a good meal, a walk or a good play in the park and a rub of ears and belly. Hanging out with Koji, just rubbing his head kept me going in some of the most difficult times that I have had in the last 12 years. Koji was always there, waiting for me, loving me and everyday I couldn't wait to get back to him, to get back to my real life.
The memorial page is short a few hundred photos because his puppy hood is on film and that's all packed. So all I have is a selection pulled from the few hundred photos I have from when I got a digital camera. Some photos are also from other people who have submitted what they had over the years. Missing photos include Koji at 10 weeks - 2 years, his first real experience with snow, and various other shots from years 3 - 6. I also have recent shots on video which I will copy to disc as soon as I can find the cables, currently packed as well.
Good bye my sweet baby boy, I love you more than anything and I miss you terribly.
Blair